Today

In the words of John Denver "Some Days are diamonds, some days are stone". I won't go into the details of why it was a stony day, because I kind of just want to forget about them. And because if I'm honest with myself and think about my hard things, I know full well that they really are just first world problems. Even though I know that, I still let myself have a nice good cry today.

I think pregnancy changes me. I feel more teary. I feel tired. I feel maxed out. The last couple weeks I feel like I'm falling behind on everything.  I'm sure it's partly hormonal, but by the time 1:00 hits I'm so tired I can barely keep my body moving. That's part of the reason I'm falling behind, because if I don't nap for a few minutes every afternoon I feel awful and short tempered.

I wish I could just force my body to keep going "Move body! Move. You have things to do." I don't know if it's because I'm almost 30 or if it's just because it's my fourth pregnancy, but for whatever reason my body feels exhausted. Probably has something to do with the fact that instead of enjoying REM I enjoy RALAMWAPFTAN in other words rolling around like a mad woman and peeing five times a night.

At the dinner table tonight, I was trying my best to put on a smile and seem energetic, but I couldn't help it, when it was my turn at the table to say my favorite and worst part of the day, I kind of went off a little about all the worsts. I don't normally have a worst, but today I had plenty, and I just vented it out to my family. After dinner was over Liv quietly walked up to me, handed me a little note with a one dollar bill and then walked away. This is what her note said "I am sory I orgyood (argued) with you. I love you Mom".

Seriously? What a doll. It was so sweet it made me cry. Especially knowing how careful she is about saving her precious money. The dollar is from the tooth fairy money and has been something she has been saving for a LONG time. She said she wants to save it until she goes to college, unless of course her Mom has a little break down and then she gives it away happily. What a sweetheart. I tell you, sometimes the rough days are all the sweeter when they bring out genuine love and sweet acts like this.

After dinner, Jaron put the kids down, and I went for a walk with my neighbor. We had such a great talk. We talked a lot about life. I was able to share my testimony about some things I love and feel strongly about. I could feel the spirit in our conversation.  I felt rejuvenated and good when we got done.

I'm still tired, but I feel better. I'm grateful for good friends. I'm grateful for sweet children, and for the best husband in the world. I guess now that I think about it, maybe today was a diamond after all. Maybe the stony parts had to happen just so I could recognize the diamonds in my life.