Today

In the words of John Denver "Some Days are diamonds, some days are stone". I won't go into the details of why it was a stony day, because I kind of just want to forget about them. And because if I'm honest with myself and think about my hard things, I know full well that they really are just first world problems. Even though I know that, I still let myself have a nice good cry today.

I think pregnancy changes me. I feel more teary. I feel tired. I feel maxed out. The last couple weeks I feel like I'm falling behind on everything.  I'm sure it's partly hormonal, but by the time 1:00 hits I'm so tired I can barely keep my body moving. That's part of the reason I'm falling behind, because if I don't nap for a few minutes every afternoon I feel awful and short tempered.

I wish I could just force my body to keep going "Move body! Move. You have things to do." I don't know if it's because I'm almost 30 or if it's just because it's my fourth pregnancy, but for whatever reason my body feels exhausted. Probably has something to do with the fact that instead of enjoying REM I enjoy RALAMWAPFTAN in other words rolling around like a mad woman and peeing five times a night.

At the dinner table tonight, I was trying my best to put on a smile and seem energetic, but I couldn't help it, when it was my turn at the table to say my favorite and worst part of the day, I kind of went off a little about all the worsts. I don't normally have a worst, but today I had plenty, and I just vented it out to my family. After dinner was over Liv quietly walked up to me, handed me a little note with a one dollar bill and then walked away. This is what her note said "I am sory I orgyood (argued) with you. I love you Mom".

Seriously? What a doll. It was so sweet it made me cry. Especially knowing how careful she is about saving her precious money. The dollar is from the tooth fairy money and has been something she has been saving for a LONG time. She said she wants to save it until she goes to college, unless of course her Mom has a little break down and then she gives it away happily. What a sweetheart. I tell you, sometimes the rough days are all the sweeter when they bring out genuine love and sweet acts like this.

After dinner, Jaron put the kids down, and I went for a walk with my neighbor. We had such a great talk. We talked a lot about life. I was able to share my testimony about some things I love and feel strongly about. I could feel the spirit in our conversation.  I felt rejuvenated and good when we got done.

I'm still tired, but I feel better. I'm grateful for good friends. I'm grateful for sweet children, and for the best husband in the world. I guess now that I think about it, maybe today was a diamond after all. Maybe the stony parts had to happen just so I could recognize the diamonds in my life.

Buster just walked up to me and with his serious low voice and eyebrows raised said "I got my feet". I said "You got your feet?" He said "Yea, I got my feet". And waddled away. I'm so glad he has his feet.

Domestic Life Scribbles

These scribbles are the "WORTH IT" part of being a Momma. 

Scribble #1. Bed time with Buster. He's by far my biggest snuggle bug. At any given moment if I simply say the words "I hold you" and reach out my arms, he will let me pick him up and snuggle his little tan face into the crook of my neck. If I'm really lucky he'll drape his arms around my neck and rub my back lovingly while I hold him. 

The camera was out, so we took some silly pictures right before bed. They are blurry, and we both look like we are ready for bed, but they show his cute personality so I'm posting them. 

Scribble #2. This girl is a doll. She just is. And now that she has lost a tooth, and has aquired quite the little lisp because of it, she is even more of a doll. She made the fortunate mistake of saying to me "Look how wiggly my tooth is Mom" to which I said "Cool! Let me see" Yank! She didn't even know what happened. She has yet to put it under her pillow, because she wants to spend some time composing a card to the tooth fairy as she always does when she loses teeth. The contents of these cards always ask for permission to keep the tooth, and end with a flattering compliment to the tooth fairy just to win her over. "And by the way you are so pretty etc etc".  I guess the flattery works with this tooth fairy, because she has yet to fly away with any of this little doll's teeth.

Scribble #3. This little hooligan, though not the quickest to obey, sure is happy once I can finally get him to do what he is supposed to be doing.

Scribble #4.  I believe this is the best haircut I have ever given my son, so I had to document it. Now don't look too closely. If you're actually a professional don't look at all, but I've come along way, which is to say that in my desire to be economical I have had to make some unfortunate mistakes on the boys in this family in order to learn what I'm doing. Whew. There's been some doozies. Poor boys.

 Scribble #5. Today we made Jaron his favorite dinner since it is his birthday week; grilled fajitas, with a salad. Then for dessert chocolate cake. The kids decided to surprise him with a few love notes to start the dinner off right. Liv even snuck some cookies out of the pantry and placed them on Dad's chair. Then she turned to us and exclaimed "Don't sit on your chair Dad, you might crunch something". Underneath two oreos this is what he found:

 Translation: "Dear Dad, I love you so much. I hope your back will get better (his back has been really hurting him). You are the cookie of my heart. To Dad". Then below it says "Olivia! Dad! (Star) Cookie of my heart. Ah that sweet little thing. See what I mean. Doll.

Here's Warner's love note:

When Jaron first opened Warner's note he said "I love your whale Warner" to which Warner said solemnly "It's not a whale Dad it's a heart". Except it sounded so much cuter than that, because he still doesn't quite say his r's. He then promptly grabbed the hard ran out of the room and quietly said "But I think I will turn it into a whale". He came back with this as the final product.

One more random scribble.
Scribble #6. 
The other day while driving in the car Warner was going on and on about a dream he had. It was getting harder and harder to pay attention, especially for J who was driving and trying to focus on the road, so was not being as responsive as Warner's attention demanded. . . hmm wonder where he gets that from. Anyway, finally Jaron said "Ok Warner just give me the high points". To which Warner paused for a second, took a big breath, and then began to continue on in the highest voice he could muster "And so" said in a falsetto that could have easily been mistaken for a voice that speaks after inhaling helium.

We laughed so hard we cried.